Many many thoughts this week...
Not sure why I'm feeling really down these few days...feeling lousy about myself, and don't know why I'm pessimistic and feeling i've lost my confidence in myself. I wonder when have I lost it, and why i've lost it.
Sometimes I just care too much about what others think about me...I think its bad, but sometimes this consciousness just comes...we sometimes call it wanting to be accepted maybe. I just want to be myself. If I dun feel like talking, I dun talk, if I dun like someone, i show my true feelings...at least I'm true to the people around me, I'm not the sort to put a fake mask in front of people. I thought its good to be true, but then sometimes I feel bad if I unintentionally say something wrong, giving people the wrong impression. Maybe I just dunno how to talk properly..plus I'm quite blur sometimes...I think i'm too quiet in front of people I'm not very comfortable with while I talk non-stop when I'm with my buddies...good and bad...bad: people might think i'm unfriendly...perhaps I put a wall around me.
Some of my good frens had to reassure me that they love me for who I am...haha..thanx kat and jen!
Just confused when such thoughts arise in me...feelng i'm flawed and lacking in many areas..feeling i'm not good enough, feeling i'm not being what i want myself to be...I want to be the cheerful girl whom I once was...I want my frens to know i love them all...haha! MAYBE its studies taking a toll on me!!! NO LIFE LA!
Blabbing and blabbing...i wonder if i do make sense of what I'm writing. Someone brightened my day a little today..my supervisor praised me for writing a good essay! Confidence level up! =)
My supervisor asked me if I wanted to continue after honours to do post grad...I said i din want to...I knew I was ready to move on to my next stage of life! Enough of studying...I'm ready to work, to join the police force..its really what i desire to do now..I'm suddenly so sure of what I want in life, and looking forward to my career. I'm sure God has put this desire in my heart and He'll bless me in my decision.
Alright, back to writing my journals...hoping to get it published soon...I'm glad my project is going on well...can see God working in my sch work, guiding me and teaching me all things, showing me so much favour, blessing me with help and guidance from all over...When the blessings come, it just comes and overfills me. Thankyou Abba Father! Thankyou Jesus!
Restore me and I shall not lack. For Jesus is my provider.
Sometimes I just care too much about what others think about me...I think its bad, but sometimes this consciousness just comes...we sometimes call it wanting to be accepted maybe. I just want to be myself. If I dun feel like talking, I dun talk, if I dun like someone, i show my true feelings...at least I'm true to the people around me, I'm not the sort to put a fake mask in front of people. I thought its good to be true, but then sometimes I feel bad if I unintentionally say something wrong, giving people the wrong impression. Maybe I just dunno how to talk properly..plus I'm quite blur sometimes...I think i'm too quiet in front of people I'm not very comfortable with while I talk non-stop when I'm with my buddies...good and bad...bad: people might think i'm unfriendly...perhaps I put a wall around me.
Some of my good frens had to reassure me that they love me for who I am...haha..thanx kat and jen!
Just confused when such thoughts arise in me...feelng i'm flawed and lacking in many areas..feeling i'm not good enough, feeling i'm not being what i want myself to be...I want to be the cheerful girl whom I once was...I want my frens to know i love them all...haha! MAYBE its studies taking a toll on me!!! NO LIFE LA!
Blabbing and blabbing...i wonder if i do make sense of what I'm writing. Someone brightened my day a little today..my supervisor praised me for writing a good essay! Confidence level up! =)
My supervisor asked me if I wanted to continue after honours to do post grad...I said i din want to...I knew I was ready to move on to my next stage of life! Enough of studying...I'm ready to work, to join the police force..its really what i desire to do now..I'm suddenly so sure of what I want in life, and looking forward to my career. I'm sure God has put this desire in my heart and He'll bless me in my decision.
Alright, back to writing my journals...hoping to get it published soon...I'm glad my project is going on well...can see God working in my sch work, guiding me and teaching me all things, showing me so much favour, blessing me with help and guidance from all over...When the blessings come, it just comes and overfills me. Thankyou Abba Father! Thankyou Jesus!
Restore me and I shall not lack. For Jesus is my provider.
posted by God's Beloved at 11:39 PM
3 Comments:
hey yo, cheer up!
Hey girl, thanx! =)
police force?!?!?! woohoooooo!!!
yay at the end of the day the whole group of us may become public servant(s) hahahahaha!!!!
and yea.. do not care about what others think about you, but not to the extent of becomign self-centered. I'm confident of you becoming your old self. I see the improvements. Live on well girl! We shall battle the evil forces together... hiak hiak hiak
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